Lễ dạm ngõ
At the bride's home
The first formal meeting of the two families, usually immediate family only. It rarely needs an invitation.
Engagement invitations sent as a link
A Lễ ăn hỏi has a shorter guest list than the wedding and a stricter one: most guests are senior relatives of both families. An online invitation addresses each of them by name and rank instead of sending one generic line to everybody.
Three separate rites — do not merge them
Naming the wrong rite on an invitation is the kind of mistake every relative notices. Here is where it usually happens.
Lễ ăn hỏi (engagement)
At the bride's home
The groom's family carries ceremonial trays over to ask for the marriage. Relatives from both sides and close friends are invited — this is the rite that needs a card.
The wedding and the banquet
Both homes, then the restaurant
Lễ Vu Quy at the bride’s home, Lễ Tân Hôn at the groom’s, then the banquet. Separate cards, separate guest lists.
What an engagement card has to get right
Not the design — the wording and the hours.
A salutation per guest
One card, but an uncle opens "Kính mời ông bà" and a classmate opens "Thân mời bạn". Every guest gets their own link, and nobody sees anyone else’s.
Both families, and birth rank
Grandparents or parents from both sides are named, with Trưởng nam / Thứ nữ if the family wants it. Where only a father or only a mother is living, the card writes "Ông" or "Bà" instead of "Ông Bà" — it never pairs that honorific with a single name.
The hour the groom's family arrives
Both that hour and the hour of the rite itself, with the lunar date calculated in Vietnam time. The tray-carrying party knows when to be there without calling to check.
Directions to the house
The address opens a map with one tap. The rite happens at a private home, and a street name alone will not find a house down an alley.
RSVP
Guests answer yes or no on the card itself. Food cooked at home is counted per head, so that number decides the shopping.
It becomes the wedding card later
Change the template, change the date, switch on the banquet section — the family details you already typed stay. No retyping four grandparents a second time.
Three steps, done in one sitting
- 1
Pick a template that suits the rite
A Lễ ăn hỏi leans traditional: red, gold, dragon and phoenix. Choose first and type later; switching designs never loses anything.
- 2
Name both families, set the hours
The parents on both sides, the couple, the arrival hour and the address. The lunar date is calculated for you.
- 3
Add guests, send personal links
Enter the guest list with each salutation and every person gets a link carrying their own name. Who opened it and who replied sits on one board.
Common questions
Is Lễ ăn hỏi the same as a betrothal or engagement ceremony?
Yes. "Ăn hỏi" is the usual northern name, "đính hôn" the more common southern and official one. On the card, use whichever name the two families themselves use.
How many people get invited?
Far fewer than the wedding — typically a few dozen: close relatives of both families, the tray-carrying party, and a handful of close friends. Most of them are senior to the couple, which is why the salutation matters more than the artwork.
Which rite name goes on the card?
"Lễ ăn hỏi" or "Lễ đính hôn", held at the bride’s home. Do not use Vu Quy or Tân Hôn here: those belong to the wedding day — Vu Quy is the rite at the bride’s home, Tân Hôn the one at the groom’s.
Should the number of trays appear on the card?
No. The count is settled privately between the two families — odd numbers in the north (5, 7, 9, 11 trays), even numbers in the south (6 or 8). Guests do not need it; the card needs the hour and the address.
Do we have to start over for the wedding invitation?
Nothing gets retyped. Family details, photos and guest list stay; you change the template, the date, and switch on the banquet section. If you would rather keep both cards to look back on, create a second one — and the second card is discounted.
Is a link hard for older guests?
The card opens straight in the browser, with nothing to install and no sign-in. Sent through Zalo it is one tap. There is a text-size button for anyone who needs larger type.
Related pages
Traditional dragon and phoenix cardsRed, gold and dragon-phoenix designs for the more traditional rites.Open page Save the date pageTell far-away relatives the date before the formal invitation goes out.Open page Lunar date converterLook up the lunar date and auspicious hour so the card carries them correctly.Open page Invitation message writerThe words you send alongside the link, with versions for elders and for friends.Open page
Once the date is agreed, the card is the easy part
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